"do what you think is right while you’ve got the power to do it. When you finally get the keys to the government car, drive it."It's something that I struggle with on a regular basis. MomC and I used to skirmish a lot of what we should do about various problems that the boys have. One of the things that I've enjoyed post divorce is realizing that I don't have to get her agreement.
Two summers ago I arranged for Middle Son to spend a week at Easter Seals Camp Stand By Me. Shortly before he left for camp, MomC said she didn't think he'd be able to handle it and we shouldn't send him. And I said I've paid for it, I think he should go, and if there are problems I'll take care of it. We'll never find out what his is capable of if we don't push the envelop occasionally. So he went. By all indications he had a great time. They sent back a CD of pictures and there were lots of pictures of him with a huge smile on his face.
Getting the service dog for him was another example. We'd talked on and off for several years about getting a dog for him, and MomC had said that she'd work on it. And nothing happened. When Middle Son started climbing over the fence at her house and wandering the neighborhood, I decided to exercise my power. Within 8 weeks, I had a contract signed and a dog in training. We've had Willow for a year now, and Middle Son has stopped climbing over MomC's fence, even though Willow doesn't go to her house.