Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Not About Information Exchange

I was listening in on a coaching class by Bob Dunham today, and heard something that struck a chord for me.
"Communication is not about exchange of information, it is about creating a shared future."
I was thinking about how this applies to Middle Son.  When we communicate, very little information passes from him to me--I have a really hard time figuring out what he is trying to tell me.  It looks like he has less trouble with that.  More often than not he seems to understand what I'm trying to tell him.  It works best when I am trying to get clear, concrete information to him.  I don't know how much abstract communication really makes sense to him.

When Middle communicates with me, it tends to be about a very near-term shared future that he wants to create.  A future in which he is eating a cookie.  A future in which I am tickling him.  A future in which the Muppet Show is playing in the DVD player.

No comments: